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Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Feeling better makes me want to mock my dates

When you've been really sick for a long time and then you start getting better-you almost don't want to say anything. You don't want to jinx it.
I did that last January when I got on a new seizure drug. Within hours  I felt like a fog lifted, and I got all excited and went around telling everyone I was better. Then I started to have an adverse reaction to it and it actually made me worse. That was a bummer, and the reason why I spent my birthday weeping alone in my trailer watching the Bourne Identity over and over for two days.
This time I've taken each good day with a grain of salt, and the improvement has been slower but steadier. In addition to following my "Regular" doctor's thing, I'm also seeing a biochemist who told me to completely change my diet and take massive amounts of methylated folate and B vitamins. Apparently 30% of the population can't "methylate" their folate(I still haven't asked him what that means) which is one of the ways our bodies get rid of toxins. When the toxins build up our bodies switch on genes for things like autoimmune diseases, Alzheimer's, or porphyria-depending on which genes you have on a helix they call "This Sucks." I'm being specific about this here because it causes depression-and it's the only supplement or drug I've ever taken that has worked without making me sick. If you are depressed and sick maybe call up a biochemist and ask him about "methylation."

So, even though it feels like inching out onto a frozen lake; not sure if it's solid but you start dancing anyway, I'm getting better. I am better. For six weeks, and it's amazing.
First the pain stopped, then my skin stopped turning purple; then one morning I woke up and realized that for the first time in two years I didn't feel like I had the flu. Now it's been weeks, and I feed good every day.
So it's possible. But maybe for some people it just takes a little longer. I know I would have given up if I didn't have my mother.

Some people celebrate victory by running a 5K for charity or something but I'm not an "exercise"  person so instead I'm going to do a marathon of a different sort. In honor of my Mom ( Who thinks I'm funny) and to celebrate coming back to life, and the new kickstarter campaign to print the illustrated books-
I'll be launching "Thirty Days of OkCupid" by drawing a trading card featuring an OkCupid date I *may or *may not have gone on, mind your own business, each day of the kickstarter.
They will be packaged as rewards called Online Dating Tarot Cards (because they also foretell the future. For example-if you draw The Boob Grabber it means the stars have aligned for you to just reach out and grab what you want in life.)

People should also send me their worst online dating stories because
1. I like hearing people's stories
2. Maybe I will make them into a card. Thirty is a lot of dates. I have memory problems.

* These two totally count by the way. 28 to go!

1 comment:

  1. Love the idea of the trading cards! I was on for a while and I had some doozies. I was at a restaurant having dinner with a guy I had just met and he took off his shoes and put his feet up on the table (in the middle of the restaurant). He simply said, "This is just the kind of guy I am." I had nothing but horrible online-dating experiences and actually considered writing a book called "" but I like the trading card idea better. Have fun with it!